The Land of Shadow:
There, peeping among the cloud-wrack above a dark tor high up in the mountains, Sam saw a white star twinkle for a while. The beauty of it smote his heart, as he looked up out of the forsaken land, and hope returned to him. For like a shaft, clear and cold, the thought pierced him that in the end the Shadow was only a small and passing thing: there was light and high beauty forever beyond its reach. -The Return of the KIng -JR Tolkien
http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/The_Return_of_the_King
We have received some thought provoking e-mails in connection with our “Leaving Wonderland” series. One comment jumped out at both of us.
“I think that if Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum had acted when Adam’s family first talked with them, the pedophile would have been fired but would not be in prison and, in fact, would most likely be at some other church doing the same horrible things except being more careful and possibly preying on younger children who would be even less likely to tell.”
This statement shows a common misperception. A few years back, Pat Robertson (we’ll get around to him on another post) made an odd pronouncement, which was characteristic of him. He said something like, “The hurricane did not hit our area because I prayed for it to go off course.” Well, the media had a field day with this ridiculous comment and for good reason.
The hurricane hit elsewhere and caused catastrophic damage and loss of life. Obviously, there were people living in the devastated area that prayed the same prayer. So, does God have selective hearing with Robertson always having His listening ear? Is it good that the hurricane destroyed another area and not Pat Robertson’s mansion?
Here's the all-important question. Did the individual making the above comment believe it was preferable that the victims in Wonderland continue to be harmed in order to protect an unknown group? Is this really an either/or situation? Perhaps if this incident had been reported a year earlier an investigation would have occurred, and the predator would have been discovered and arrested. Obviously, many young teens would have benefited from this, including unknown adolescents of an unknown kingdom. Yes, it’s a bit convoluted.
What if, what if, what if. . . . . . .
Let us ponder whether the situation could have turned out differently.
Here are the "what ifs" in the kingdom of Wonderland.
1.What if the Tweedles had acted upon the information given in the original meeting with Adam’s parents? Tweedle Dum revealed that he remembers the flashing incident being discussed during that meeting. In fact, that was the reason for the meeting! What if they had reported it to some outside sources? Could a year's worth of rape and abuse have been prevented?
2. What if the Tweedles had shown some insight into this kind of activity at a church youth camp instead of just assuming it was “locker room behavior"? What if Tweedle Dee had actually remembered the meeting with Adam's parents (which Tweedle Dee initiated and which took place in HIS office), instead of conveniently forgetting about it (a la Bill Clinton's famous "I don't remember line…)? It's difficult to comprehend that those who have been professionally trained to work with teens would not raise AT LEAST one eyebrow upon hearing that a mentor had encouraged church youth to expose themselves.
By the way, what in the world is locker room behavior? We honestly don't know. Do men just blow it off? Without a doubt there are some mothers (including us) and fathers who would have been extremely angry if they found out that the merry men had not reported this unusual behavior to them confidentially so they could decide how to handle their own children.
3. What if, instead of assuming that pastors are NOT "mandatory reporters", they had sought to understand the law about mandatory reporting from authorities? What if they had realized that pedophiles are EVERYWHERE and the church is NOT to blame for having one in it’s midst? What if they had shown less concern for their positions and potential lawsuits and reported the events, come what may? Is God not Sovereign? Could He not have stepped in and given the Tweedles and others the strength to do the right thing?
4. So what if the church had been sued? What if the king and his merry men had believed that the truth was far more important than a lawsuit? Did they not trust God to support them in such a happenstance?
5. What if the parents had been told that this "mentor" was taking their young teenage sons to inappropriate (R-rated) movies and that this was the real reason for the youth volunteer's temporary suspension? Had our children been involved, we would have petitioned for his immediate dismissal and kept our children away from him! What if the pastors had forbidden the seminary student's return after he was suspended? What if those "in charge" understood that if this so-called "mentor" lied once, he was demonstrating a serious character flaw as a pastor-in-training and would probably lie again?
6. What if the pedophile's roommates (also kings in-training ) had questioned why their buddy was constantly having sleepovers with young teenagers and having them share his bed and his room? Does anyone find this behavior odd besides us? It's interesting to note that these two roommates, who lived with the pedophile a few months before his arrest, are now the king's men in Wonderland.
7. What if the king of Wonderland had immediately returned from his cruise and led the effort to console the families of the victims and secure professional help for those who had been molested?
8. What if the king and his merry men had apologized to Adam and his family instead of saying it would be INAPPROPRIATE to do so?
9. What if the victims had received immediate counseling?
10. What if the Fellowship of the Wounded had been correctly viewed as the priesthood of the believers instead of a bunch of troublemakers?
11. What if the king and his merry men had stood up in front of the congregation, admitted their shortcomings, and asked for forgiveness?
12 What if the king had told the reporter from the Wonderland Herald that he and the staff had "screwed up" but that they were making every effort to rectify their mistakes? What if they admitted that all Christians have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God? What if the pastor told the reporter that his kingdom was going to lead the way in helping other kingdoms avoid the position in which Wonderland now found itself?
13. What if the king decreed that the entire church would set aside a day of fasting, repentance, and prayer?
What if, what if, what if?. . . . . . .
Let us tell you the true story of a king who committed a terrible sin against God, himself, his family, his congregation, and his community. The names and places have been changed, but the essentials of the story are accurate.
There is a wonderful citizen of another territory. He used to be a king, but he did something wrong. He had an affair. When the affair was exposed, the king immediately resigned his position. He called a meeting of all the citizens of his kingdom. When they arrived at the Meeting Hall, they found all the chairs placed in a circle. In the middle of this circle was a lonely chair and a very sad man.
He admitted the affair to all who were present. Then he did something that stunned those present. He said, “I have sinned against all of you, not just you as a group but as individuals. I have hurt you and caused much pain. So, starting now, until it is finished, I want each of you to get up and tell me how I have caused you pain. Don’t candy coat it. Tell me all of the pain and anger. Tell me how I have let you down.” And so, through the wee hours of the morning they did exactly what he asked. Many tears were shed and much pain was expressed. This king then put himself under church discipline and has never returned to the pulpit.
Recently, one of us had the chance to tell him, “You are my hero.” Why? He demonstrated how a spiritual leader biblically handles sin in his own life. Martin Luther said, “Go and sin boldly". Why? Because all of us goof up each and every day. This dear man has a saying: “Even on my best days my motives are mixed.” How we respond when confronted with our sin demonstrates whether we really buy into our sorry state as fallen creatures in need of a Savior. This fallen pastor who has sincerely repented before God and man is worthy of following because he demonstrated the biblical response to the human condition. We are all in need of our Savior Jesus Christ.
Why did none of the "what ifs" occur? It's really quite simple. Wonderland is a closed system. Our Lord told us to let our light shine before men so that they might see. The world is weary of plastic preachers who project a perfect persona. Authentic Christianity is what a watching world really wants to see. We should strive to display the beauty of Jesus living in us along with all of our warts.
Let’s open up the windows and let the fresh air circulate! Let’s show the world why we need a Savior. Let’s show them how to fall and how to get back up again.
In response to yesterday's post, an attorney whom we do not know made some remarks on this blog. Perhaps you saw them. This individual has posted several comments before, and his passion and concern for the lost and broken are evident. Here is his unsolicited comment:
ARCE
Churches that attack the victims or their advocates should be exposed! As an attorney, I would also recommend a demand for immediate commitment to providing professional counseling by specialists in the field of pedophilia victim recovery, and insist that it begin immediately. IF NOT, the church should be sued for negligent supervision and/or negligent entrustment, and severe damages sought that would put it out of business. In addition, the senior pastor and other senior personnel of the church that had a supervisory role should be sued as individuals. This is the only way to put a halt to churches sweeping these things under the rug and avoiding responsibility. As an attorney who has worked with churches when a pastor has violated his obligations sexually and financially (and usually also by making organizational changes to enhance his power), my experience has been that some in the congregation will always be willing to forgive the perpetrator and attack the victim, and we must be strong in our response to put an end to that.
WEDNESDAY, JUNE 3, 2009 – 06:39 PM
These comments are thought provoking. What if things had been handled differently in Wonderland? We believe there were several pivotal moments when a different action would have led to complete resolution. In fact, had certain responses been different, we would have NEVER exposed this story.
It's important to stress that this blog WOULD have occurred regardless of what happened in Wonderland. It's been two years in the making. We finally decided to trust God and follow the Holy Spirit's prompting in our hearts. Incredibly, we're beginning to understand that we're not alone in our deep concerns about the future of Christendom. The kingdom of God is being corrupted and we WILL NOT allow these issues to go unchallenged. We have begun to receive e-mails daily from abused and weary Christians all over this country, and we intend to elucidate the problems they are facing. What we've learned from our personal experience in Wonderland is how to be Good Samaritans. To God be the glory!