It is a serious thing to live in a society of possible gods and goddesses, to remember that the dullest and most uninteresting person you talk to may one day be a creature which, if you saw it now, you would be strongly tempted to worship, or else a horror and a corruption such as you now meet, if at all, only in a nightmare. All day long we are, in some degree, helping each other to one or other of these destinations.
CS Lewis
We’re getting ready to leave the Heartbreak Hotel but not before making some final comments about the Memphis Mess. This tragedy teaches all of us a very important lesson – God’s truth WILL find us out sooner or later. We can cover up the dark corners of our lives, but in all likelihood they will be exposed in this lifetime, even if it takes 17 years, as was the case with Paul Williams.
We acknowledge that Steve Gaines inherited this big mess, but he perpetuated the problem by doing the very same thing as those who knew of William’s sexual misconduct – NOTHING! He didn’t call Child Protective Services upon learning of the egregious sin, even if it happened almost two decades ago. It also appears that he didn’t contact Paul Williams’ son to verify that he and his father had restored their relationship.
Gaines was likely relieved when Williams confided to him that the matter had been resolved. Was that true? Absolutely not! Had Gaines done the right thing and set up a meeting with Williams’ son, he probably would have found out six months earlier that the relationship between Williams and his son wasn’t hunky dory. Gaines would have looked like a hero instead of a heel, even though some people’s “feelings” might have been hurt like Paul Williams, his wife, and their loyal supporters.
Sometimes pastors have to handle difficult situations, even though they would rather not. That’s called being a shepherd. The good shepherd left the ninety-nine and went out and found the one that was lost. Why didn’t Gaines reach out to Williams’ son? Once again, it seems the victim is the one who is neglected. Williams was getting counseling under Gaines’ watch. How about his son?
Did ANYONE at Bellevue check to see how Williams’ son was doing? We are grateful that he finally sought counseling after so many years, and we pray that God will fully restore him.
If indeed Paul Williams was himself a victim of sexual abuse, it reinforces the fact that those who have been molested need professional help as soon as possible. We need to put an end to the cycle of abuse. Hiding it will only perpetuate it.
Your blog queens are well aware that some in Christian leadership view women as the weaker sex and that we SHOULD NEVER be allowed to teach men. After all, it’s in the Bible!!!
WARNING!!! These recommendations should only be read by women, children, and men who do not hold to this narrow interpretation of Scripture.
If a pastor commits any kind of sexual six (adultery, pedophilia, etc.), we believe he has disqualified himself from the ministry according to 1 Timothy 3:4-5 and should NEVER serve as a pastor again. Here are the qualifications for the office of overseer: 1 Timothy 3:1-7 (NASB)
1 It is a trustworthy statement: if any man aspires to the office of overseer, it is a fine work he desires to do.
2 An overseer, then, must be above reproach, the husband of one wife, temperate, prudent, respectable, hospitable, able to teach,
3 not addicted to wine or pugnacious, but gentle, peaceable, free from the love of money.
4 He must be one who manages his own household well, keeping his children under control with all dignity
5 (but if a man does not know how to manage his own household, how will he take care of the church of God?)
6 and not a new convert, so that he will not become conceited and fall into the condemnation incurred by the devil.
7 And he must have a good reputation with those outside the church, so that he will not fall into reproach and the snare of the devil.
It seems clear to us that Williams violated 1 Timothy 3:4-5. We believe that those who commit sexual sin should be restored, but not to the pastorate. They should find other ways to serve in God’s kingdom.
Victims MUST be given professional counseling, not pastoral counseling, IMMEDIATELY! It seems that so often the victims are either ignored or blamed. This is called re-victimizing the victim. Does anyone really care about the victim?
Wives of child molesters need to WAKE UP and SPEAK UP! We find it hard to believe that Paul Williams’ wife did not know what transpired during that 12 to 18 months when her husband was sexually molesting her son. As difficult as it may be to stand against one’s husband, we believe it is imperative that Christian mothers protect their children from sexual predators, even if they are married to them! How do women who look the other way live with themselves? Where are their motherly instincts?
Those who do not learn from history are destined to repeat it. We pray that many valuable lessons have been learned from the “Memphis Mess”.
Well, it’s check out time at the Heartbreak Hotel, and we want to leave you with one of Elvis’ later songs. Although he’s singing about being hurt by his significant other, we believe the lyrics still apply to this tragic situation.
HURT
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EfUhip9jvH8&feature=related