Updated: Brian *Doug* Goodrich, Greensboro, NC, Registered Sex Offender, Sexually Abused Many Young Male Teens and Changed the Trajectory of My Life

http://www.publicdomainpictures.net/view-image.php?image=11174&picture=snowy-sova-oci
Owl watching

“Never laugh at live dragons” JRR Tolkien


This one is personal.

Earlier this week I got a cold/virus. My medical family prevailed upon me to get tested for COVID and it was, as I suspected, negative. However, I didn’t ‘t feel well for most of the week. My spirits took a nosedive when I learned that Brian *Doug* Goodrich had been released from prison and was allegedly living in Greensboro with family members.

This part of my story was covered in the Washington Post The Crusading Bloggers Exposing Abuse in Protestant Churches: No one was paying attention — until these armchair investigators came along by Sarah Standkorb. Here is a quote from the relevant section.

In 2006, leaders at Parsons’s former church, Providence Baptist, called in Parsons and other parents for a meeting. A seminary student and church volunteer who led a youth Bible study, Brian “Doug” Goodrich, had been found with a child in a local park. That child, it seemed, was not the only suspected victim. “We’re so sorry there were some boys who were harmed,” Parsons says she recalls the church leaders saying; she also remembers them saying they hadn’t received any prior reports of wrongdoing and that, “if you have any information, let us know. The police are involved.” The church leaders asked the parents not to talk among themselves to figure out which boys had been victims, to protect their privacy. (Parsons’s son had soccer practice during Goodrich’s Bible study and wasn’t part of the core group of boys who regularly interacted with Goodrich.)

A few weeks later, a friend and fellow congregant, Janet Wilson, told Parsons her elder son was one of the boys involved. Parsons was afraid to talk about it, since the parents had been instructed not to; besides, she trusted the matter was being well handled by law enforcement and the church.

In 2007, Goodrich was convicted on 10 charges of statutory sex offense, indecent liberties and first-degree sex exploitation, and sentenced to 13 years in prison. Wilson was understandably distressed during the investigation, and after the conviction she stopped by Parsons’s house, wracked with guilt. Wilson wished she’d done more, she told Parsons, because the church leaders had known about Goodrich before the 2006 incident. In 2005, Wilson says that she and her husband had described incidents with Goodrich to two youth pastors. Goodrich had exposed himself to a group of boys, including Wilson’s eldest son, at church camp, Wilson told Parsons, and encouraged them to reciprocate.

At the time, Wilson had been too embarrassed to tell anyone else about the flashing, or about the conversation with the youth pastors in which she and her husband reported Goodrich’s behavior. But Wilson knew her son was not the only boy hurt by Goodrich’s abuse. “My kids were okay,” she told Parsons that day, “but I feel terrible that these other boys have been harmed.” Wilson told me, “I felt guilty because the church knew about it. They didn’t feel guilty, but I did.”

Parsons was appalled — and decided to do something about it. She, Wilson and a few church friends wrote a letter to the church elders reminding them of the earlier incident. She expected the pastors would say they’d made a horrible mistake. When they didn’t, and the church instead began an internal investigation, Parsons and her group wrote another letter to the entire congregation. Fed up, Parsons and her cardiologist husband, Bill, left Providence Baptist to join another church.

(Goodrich’s lawyer did not respond to requests for comment. Brian Frost, senior pastor at Providence Baptist, confirmed that the church’s internal investigation was motivated by Parsons’s group letter, and said church policies have since changed: Now, any report or allegation of abuse by an employee or volunteer triggers a leave of duty until an investigation is completed, and all allegations of abuse must be reported to police.)

Shortly thereafter, I was attending an Anglican church and saw the only other molester/pedophile that I knew. He was the husband of the schoolteacher at my kids’ school and you can be sure his activities were well discussed. To make matters worse, my husband and I were told we could not join this Anglican church because the Anglican pastor, who was buddies with the baptist pastor told us that we, yes *we* had to reconcile because of our unChristian actions by confronting the church for what we believed to be the mishandling of the Goodrich situation.

I ran crying from the Anglican pastor’s office as he sat like a bump on a log. At that moment, I knew I had to write a blog to see if anyone else had experienced such unjust actions. At the time, I could never have imagined that I would become an abuse advocate. But, then again, I now know I was one before I started this blog. For those who like the story tied up, the Baptist pastor retired, the Anglican pastor was fired, the pedophile I knew at the Anglican church was kicked out because he did *something” and a couple of other former pastors are reportedly doing real estate.

Goodrich’s sentence release, 

My now good friend, Christa Brown, posted the story from the News and Observer at Stop Baptist Predators. Little did I know that I would get a chance to tell her story one day as well!! I used to read Stop Baptist Predators before I started blogging.

Goodrich was sentenced by Superior Court Judge Ripley Rand to at least 13 years in state prison in exchange for guilty pleas on two counts of statutory sex offense, four counts of first-degree sexual exploitation of a minor and two counts of taking indecent liberties with a child.

Goodrich, 26, had been the leader of a Bible study group for the 13- and 14-year-old boys who attended Providence Baptist Church in North Raleigh. Wake Assistant District Attorney Adam Moyers said Goodrich used his position of trust to participate in and observe sexual acts with the boys between January 2005 and June 2006.

I wish I could tell you the extent of the abuse the young teens at my church endured. However, as I have said in the past, it is amongst some of the most disgusting acts that I have ever heard and it makes me sick to even think about them. The actual number of young teens who were molested is a bit debatable. I believe the number is over 13 and maybe as much as 20. However, a number of parents did not want their boys to testify.

For these many sexual acts on those many boys, former SEBTS seminarian only got 13 years. I wonder if he got only one year for each of the boys who testified or provided information? I believe that had this happened in the #metoo era he would have received many more years. In my mind, he deserved it although there were some church women who loved *Doug* and believed that they could help him, proving that they could not by their stupid statements.

The church did an internal investigation and, of course, all the good old boys were exonerated. One of those who assisted with this investigation was involved in the Caring Well fiasco of the SBC.

One victim’s family was not informed of Goodrich’s release

I cannot fathom why the prison would not tell all of the victims about this prolific predator’s release. Maybe they think Goodrich has been cured of his proclivities by almost 13 years in prison? If so, they are woefully misinformed.

Goodrich is on the sex offender registry in Greensboro. Here is a summary.

Here is a link to the actual registry. For some reason, his face isn’t posted so here is a link to his image.

I believe that Goodrich is still a danger to young teen males and can still cause significant harm. Local churches need to be aware of his presence.

This is a warning to SBC churches in the area. Goodrich had incredible success at Providence Baptist Church in Raleigh. It is possible that he will seek out churches in which he feels comfortable. This could lead to disaster if people are not aware of his past.

There is no cure for his predilection, only expert psychiatric intervention on the highest order to help him control his urges. Do not be naive. He likely still suffers from these urges. Prisons are not known for their expert intervention. I also believe that the typical *biblical counseling* is seriously flawed in a situation such as this.

There are numerous studies which point out the long term damage that occurs in the type of abuse mentioned in this story. A few of the church *leaders* who claimed that the *boys would be just fine* They were dangerously wrong and could have contributed to further damage by spouting such nonsense. It’s time for churches to get educated on this matter. I highly recommend studies, etc., by the National Institutes of Health. Here is one. The Psychiatric Consequences of Child and Adolescent Sexual Abuse

Stressful life experiences naturally increase the risk of psychiatric disorders such as anxiety disorders and major depression (62). Preclinical studies have shown that excessive or prolonged exposure to glucocorticoids and stress results in neurostructural alterations in limbic brain areas that may be involved in the pathogenesis of PTSD and other stress-related disorders (63,64). Numerous studies have linked major depression and dysthymia with sexual abuse (32). A history of sexual abuse has been implicated in the early onset of depressive disorders and altered response to standard medical treatments for depression. The form of sexual abuse (e.g., touching and penetration) and the victim’s relationship to the offender (e.g., closest relative and stranger) appear to influence the development and severity of depression (65).

We identified major depressive disorder as the leading disorder associated with sexual trauma. In contrast, the majority of previous studies have found that PTSD is more common than depression (42,66,67).

It is my hope that my former church has grown up in their understanding of the effects of the abuses that were perpetrated by Goodrich under their watch. I also hope that some church members, who wanted to *counsel Doug instead of having him sent to prison, have educated themselves in this matter.

Suggestions for SBC churches in Raleigh, Greensboro, etc who might encounter Goodrich in the near future.

  • I believe that he is dangerous. He needs to be watched closely and should never, ever, ever be around young teen boys or any other child or teen for that matter.
  • He may be forgiven if he is truly repentant but only God knows that for sure. Molesters are smart and know how to play the church lingo game. He must be treated as a sexual molester of young teens. No church member or leader knows what is going on in his head. Do not risk the safety of children in order to pretend that you know what is going on inside of him.
  • He’s good and tricked lots of people in the past. Molesters must be good at that trade. They often groom the parents to trust them in order to get to their kids.
  • If anyone knows that he is attending church, please let me know. I will keep your identity confidential.

In the end, Doug Goodrich meant evil for the children in my former church. I am grateful for the pain that I endured by stupid church leadership when I confronted them. They opened my eyes to the terrible pain that has invaded our churches. One elder lied about me, claiming my marriage was in trouble. He meant that for evil. God took it and used it to help many others. Yep, church leaders lie.

I’ll be watching.

PS Why do church members go to court and sit behind the molester? And why don’t prisons notify victims when predators are released?

Comments

Updated: Brian *Doug* Goodrich, Greensboro, NC, Registered Sex Offender, Sexually Abused Many Young Male Teens and Changed the Trajectory of My Life — 61 Comments

  1. “Yep, church leaders lie.” (Dee)

    Worth repeating over and over. Beware of the enemy in your midst folks … trusted church leaders cannot always be trusted. “Don’t trust every spirit, dear friends of mine, but test them to discover whether they come from God or not.” (1 John 4:1)

    Dee, sorry that you went through this valley … but thankful that you used the experience to help so many with your blog.

  2. The stress and depression from childhood sexual abuse stunts the mental growth of the victims, it can prevent some natural abilities from being improved upon. I think Dee is doing the right thing by pointing the molesters out. Some may give her grief. But, there will be some that do listen, protecting their children. Keep doing it Dee.

  3. “Molesters are smart and know how to play the church lingo game.” (Dee)

    Sexual predators (in both pulpit and pew) also know how to take advantage of the trust factor in church. I’m convinced that perverted devils “go into the ministry” knowing that they will be trusted when they get the title “Pastor” … they view the church not as a field to serve Christ, but a field of potential victims.

  4. Brian: childhood sexual abuse

    Come the day, the children are witnesses to predatory pedophiles in the church. They have the evidence. Truth. Truth bearers. They know; they speak. They unmask the monsters … in the church. Power. Truth is power. Knowledge is power. They are powerful.

  5. Max,

    It really was put to good use. There is a still a gnashing of teeth over my blog in certain Raleigh circles.

  6. Max:
    “Molesters are smart and know how to play the church lingo game.” (Dee)

    Sexual predators (in both pulpit and pew) also know how to take advantage of the trust factor in church.I’m convinced that perverted devils “go into the ministry” knowing that they will be trusted when they get the title “Pastor” … they view the church not as a field to serve Christ, but a field of potential victims.

    Grievous wolves who will come in among the church not sparing the flock is extremely Biblical. Of course, it can interfere with image and fundraising to stand guard properly and be trained to do so with accountability, transparency, and oversight. After all, isn’t so-and-so a good guy?

    Then when something happens, it can also interfere with image and fundraising to do the right thing and further protect the flock. And it’s not just the perps but the enablers who can then lead with the “we are all sinners, oopsie, let’s forgive; so, we good?” approach diverting attention from the prairie fire, complete with standing behind one of the varieties of grievous wolves at the courthouse. Lamentably predictable, though the exposure of this repeatedly can stand to show a pattern to answer and challenge the usual manipulators.

  7. dee:
    Max,

    It really was put to good use. There is a still a gnashing of teeth over my blog in certain Raleigh circles.

    Attacking the messenger rather than the issue can become quite the bloodsport, complete with feelings of accomplishment and vindication on their part while they blind themselves to what actually happened via those feelings. Not going quietly away into a hole somewhere — especially since the fallout hasn’t gone away, nor has a given issue ever been sufficiently addressed — can tend to bring hot coals on people’s heads.

  8. “PS Why do church members go to court and sit behind the molester?”
    +++++++++++++++

    to do something heroic, grace-wise.

    for the self-satisfaction of thinking oneself a non-conformist

    because it makes one feel superior to everyone else, while masking the self-righteousness with false modesty

    (combinations of the above)

  9. i needed to get informed: (i added paragraphs — for some reason really technical information is above using paragraphs)
    .
    .
    (excessive or prolonged exposure to) glucocorticoids:

    Stress and stress hormones, glucocorticoids (GCs), exert widespread actions in central nervous system, ranging from the regulation of gene transcription, cellular signaling, modulation of synaptic structure, and transmission and glial function to behavior.

    Their actions are mediated by glucocorticoid and mineralocorticoid receptors which are nuclear receptors/transcription factors.

    While GCs primarily act to maintain homeostasis by inducing physiological and behavioral adaptation, prolonged exposure to stress and elevated GC levels may result in neuro- and psychopathology.

    There is now ample evidence for cause-effect relationships between prolonged stress, elevated GC levels, and cognitive and mood disorders while the evidence for a link between chronic stress/GC and neurodegenerative disorders such as Alzheimer’s (AD) and Parkinson’s (PD) diseases is growing.

  10. it was also helpful to read about PTSD in detail.

    “A few of the church *leaders* who claimed that the *boys would be just fine*” — i hereby crown these church leaders ‘King Stupids’. (well, i think dee did this herself, long ago)
    .
    .
    PTSD:

    Post-traumatic stress disorder symptoms may start within one month of a traumatic event, but sometimes symptoms may not appear until years after the event. These symptoms cause significant problems in social or work situations and in relationships. They can also interfere with your ability to go about your normal daily tasks.

    PTSD symptoms are generally grouped into four types: intrusive memories, avoidance, negative changes in thinking and mood, and changes in physical and emotional reactions. Symptoms can vary over time or vary from person to person.

    Intrusive memories

    Symptoms of intrusive memories may include:

    -Recurrent, unwanted distressing memories of the traumatic event
    -Reliving the traumatic event as if it were happening again (flashbacks)
    -Upsetting dreams or nightmares about the traumatic event
    -Severe emotional distress or physical reactions to something that reminds you of the -traumatic event

    Avoidance

    Symptoms of avoidance may include:

    -Trying to avoid thinking or talking about the traumatic event
    -Avoiding places, activities or people that remind you of the traumatic event
    -Negative changes in thinking and mood

    Symptoms of negative changes in thinking and mood may include:

    Negative thoughts about yourself, other people or the world
    -Hopelessness about the future
    -Memory problems, including not remembering important aspects of the traumatic event
    -Difficulty maintaining close relationships
    -Feeling detached from family and friends
    -Lack of interest in activities you once enjoyed
    -Difficulty experiencing positive emotions
    -Feeling emotionally numb
    -Changes in physical and emotional reactions

    Symptoms of changes in physical and emotional reactions (also called arousal symptoms) may include:

    -Being easily startled or frightened
    -Always being on guard for danger
    Self-destructive behavior, such as drinking too much or driving too fast
    -Trouble sleeping
    -Trouble concentrating
    -Irritability, angry outbursts or aggressive behavior
    -Overwhelming guilt or shame

    For children 6 years old and younger, signs and symptoms may also include:

    -Re-enacting the traumatic event or aspects of the traumatic event through play
    -Frightening dreams that may or may not include aspects of the traumatic event

  11. had to look up ‘dysthmia’, too.
    .
    .
    Persistent depressive disorder (dysthymia)

    Persistent depressive disorder, also called dysthymia (dis-THIE-me-uh), is a continuous long-term (chronic) form of depression.

    You may lose interest in normal daily activities, feel hopeless, lack productivity, and have low self-esteem and an overall feeling of inadequacy.

    These feelings last for years and may significantly interfere with your relationships, school, work and daily activities.

    If you have persistent depressive disorder, you may find it hard to be upbeat even on happy occasions — you may be described as having a gloomy personality, constantly complaining or incapable of having fun.

    Though persistent depressive disorder is not as severe as major depression, your current depressed mood may be mild, moderate or severe.

    Symptoms
    Persistent depressive disorder symptoms usually come and go over a period of years, and their intensity can change over time. But typically symptoms don’t disappear for more than two months at a time. In addition, major depression episodes may occur before or during persistent depressive disorder — this is sometimes called double depression.

    Symptoms of persistent depressive disorder can cause significant impairment and may include:

    -Loss of interest in daily activities
    -Sadness, emptiness or feeling down
    -Hopelessness
    -Tiredness and lack of energy
    -Low self-esteem, self-criticism or feeling incapable
    -Trouble concentrating and trouble making decisions
    -Irritability or excessive anger
    -Decreased activity, effectiveness and productivity
    -Avoidance of social activities
    -Feelings of guilt and worries over the past
    -Poor appetite or overeating
    -Sleep problems

    In children, symptoms of persistent depressive disorder may include depressed mood and irritability.

  12. dee,

    dee: “There is a still a gnashing of teeth over my blog in certain Raleigh circles.”
    +++++++++++++

    after a few seconds of reflection, i find i don’t actually know what “gnashing of teeth” means, exactly.

    i’d love to hear more description.

  13. JDV: After all, isn’t so-and-so a good guy?

    How many times have we heard “But man, he could sure preach!” in reference to fallen leaders: Hybels, Driscoll, MacDonald, Ravi, etc. etc.

    To which I respond “So what!” Devils masquerading as angels of light are some of the best preachers on the planet.

  14. dee: There is a still a gnashing of teeth over my blog in certain Raleigh circles.

    And I expect a lot of those folks are faithful churchgoers. Sad.

  15. elastigirl,

    Thank you for including all of this information. It’s very helpful for those of us who survived childhood trauma, and also to folks who are having trouble sleeping and getting through the day in 2020.

  16. dee: How did you figure that out?

    I saw it first hand in my 70+ years in “church” … the Body of Christ (the real Church) suffers persecution from churchgoers all over America.

    As a lay-preacher several years ago, I preached (what I thought) was a challenging sermon to stir the pew to action for Christ in their community. At the end of the service, a leader in the church approached me and said “Young man, that spiritual stuff is OK … but we have to pay the bills around here.” I took that to mean they were more focused on keeping the church machinery going and anything (like the Great Commission) would scare the faithful and their money off … “that spiritual stuff” was for others.

    Some of the meanest people on the planet are churchgoers.

  17. elastigirl: after a few seconds of reflection, i find i don’t actually know what “gnashing of teeth” means, exactly.

    i’d love to hear more description.

    It’s what my dentist had me do when he was fitting a crown this week. I had to mash down and roll around (<<this part was most important) on a piece of paper coated with blue pigment so he could see where the new crown was hitting on the tooth below it. He then got in my mouth with the drill and proceeded to file down the crown to make sure it wasn't going to be an issue with my bite.

    The thing is, gnashing your teeth is not something you do regularly. Keep that in mind.

  18. I have the sense that when God brings about good in the context of or in response to the evil deeds of bad-hearted people, He usually does that through the costly and often sacrificial work of good-hearted people.

    Thank you, Dee, for being on of those, and I hope that you do not grow discouraged.

  19. Muslin, fka Dee Holmes,

    “The thing is, gnashing your teeth is not something you do regularly. ”
    +++++++++

    ok. so, reading between the lines and going through a process of elimination, if ones loves homemade warm dark chocolate pudding and a foot massage, I infer that one doesn’t ‘gnash their teeth’ while eating homemade warm dark chocolate pudding and getting a foot massage.

    am i on track?

  20. Max: Some of the meanest people on the planet are churchgoers.

    That has definitely been my experience. It is why sometimes I can not come even close to being myself, because these church folk hurt me so deeply by their actions and inaction’s.

  21. elastigirl: i understand myself better now.

    When I first came to TWW, bad events from my teen years were washing over me. Little by little I have felt less alone and more healed. Bits of insight have pattered gently down.

    It’s hard for me to acknowledge that childhood damage affected my behavior so far into adulthood. I’m still identifying blind spots. Stepping way back from church for five years helped hugely, if only because I now understand the risks of good emotional intensity (I made cookies!!!!!!!!) as well as bad (telling a committee that their plan will backfire). I had so much old damage that both things were draining. Much better now.

  22. mot: It is why sometimes I can not come even close to being myself, because these church folk hurt me so deeply by their actions and inaction’s.

    When the Pharisees threw the (formerly) blind man out of church for giving his testimony of being healed by Jesus, Jesus went looking for him. It’s better to be out of church with Jesus than hanging out with churchgoers who act like they don’t know Him.

  23. Friend,

    “It’s hard for me to acknowledge that childhood damage affected my behavior so far into adulthood. I’m still identifying blind spots.

    Stepping way back from church for five years helped hugely, if only because I now understand the risks of good emotional intensity (I made cookies!!!!!!!!) as well as bad (telling a committee that their plan will backfire).

    I had so much old damage that both things were draining. Much better now.”
    ++++++++++++++++++++++++++

    i think we all have an inner child.

    ha, i can seem my inner child in my mind’s eye — it’s almost unbearable — it’s like my inner child can’t bear to be seen & exposed like that. and my grown up self can’t bear to see the pathetic little metaphorical waif.

    i need to bring the two together.

    i need to be the inner child, but stand up straight and tall…. and i have to think through this quite a bit more. and the inner child needs to meet my grown up self. in a safe, affirming, way…. i have to think more about that part, too.

    i need to be my grown up self observing my inner child. accepting her. loving her. gently wipe her face with a warm cloth. smooth her hair. help her stand up. gently hold and support her shoulders to help her posture. hold her close for a while. dry her tears.

    then she and i together peel off the huge labels that were stuck to her by others, and which she stuck to herself. take off the sign hanging around her neck and send it sailing far away like a frisbee.

    …gently wash her hands in warm water and rose-scented soap. gently wash her hair with lightly rose-scented shampoo. dry and style her hair beautifully. let her pick out fabulous new clothes, entirely of her choosing.

    …i’m not sure what happens then. maybe we roll down grassy hills together, run as fast as we can just for fun. then have an ice cream sundae together…. i dunno…
    .
    .
    i know it will involve this song:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D2W-eTRLrJM&loop=0

    (i think it’s best just to listen — simpler that way. too much information to watch, too)
    .
    .
    (i’m very conservative in suggesting music. i wouldn’t include it here unless i believed it was truly right for the moment)

  24. Friend,

    ” if only because I now understand the risks of good emotional intensity (I made cookies!!!!!!!!) as well as bad (telling a committee that their plan will backfire)
    +++++++++++++

    is it experiencing that the risks are less of a big deal than previously believed?

    that life is good and you yourself are valid, strong and capable regardless of the result?

    like, if some cookies don’t turn out, it’s ok, and so what? some cookies did turn out well, and that’s terrific. or just try again and all is well?

    and, the worst that could happen is the committee disagrees, and so what?

  25. Why do people sit by them in court to show support for this bastard? Because it wasnt THEIR boy who was molested!!!

  26. elastigirl,

    The problem was investing too much goodwill.

    They were just good cookies and a bad committee plan. My smiling effort with either thing had no power to undo childhood abuse.

    So I found healing through other means. Now the cookies and ideas don’t have any cosmic significance.

    Beautiful song, and lovely imagery, by the way. An old work colleague had a bumper sticker by her desk that said, “It’s never too late to have a happy childhood.” I’ve really tried to make that happen for myself and others.

  27. Friend: Stepping way back from church for five years helped hugely,

    May I ask, if you are open to sharing, how did you know you were ready to try it again?

  28. Love the Owl pic up-top.
    Way kool to look at.
    It’s astonishing the amount of weight load they can get airborne and how their wings are designed for maximum lift at low speeds.

  29. Friend: When I first came to TWW, bad events from my teen years were washing over me. Little by little I have felt less alone and more healed. Bits of insight have pattered gently down.

    It’s hard for me to acknowledge that childhood damage affected my behavior so far into adulthood. I’m still identifying blind spots. Stepping way back from church for five years helped hugely, if only because I now understand the risks of good emotional intensity (I made cookies!!!!!!!!) as well as bad (telling a committee that their plan will backfire). I had so much old damage that both things were draining. Much better now.

    I’m still identifying my blind spots too. I’ve learned to stop saying to myself, “if I hadn’t been dealing with this, I could have done this.” I just thank God for everyday he brings and try to enjoy it.

  30. Just a few points regarding Brian Goodrich’s actions:

    http://www.stopbaptistpredators.net/article07/brian_goodrich.html

    “Goodrich’s attorney Joe Cheshire said Goodrich was deeply remorseful and was a victim of sexual abuse himself. Cheshire said Goodrich was molested by a neighbor and also a family member when Goodrich was between the ages of 4 and 12. Since his arrest, Goodrich has struggled with depression and underwent intensive therapy to address his problems, Cheshire said.”

    1. Don’t fall for his “repentance.” He didn’t ask for help beforehand.

    “In Raleigh, the abuse began when Goodrich introduced a game of truth or dare to the group, Moyers said. The dares became increasingly inappropriate, he said, with the boys eventually engaging in what police have described as group masturbation sessions.”

    2. Goodrich was getting them to think that their involvement was voluntary, thus making the victims feel that they carried part of the guilt.

    “One of his victims and parents of several of the boys wrote letters about the painful aftermath of the abuse.

    ‘He’s feels used and duped,’ the parents of one boy wrote in a letter read aloud by Moyers. ‘He felt that if the truth came out he would be ostracized.”

    This proves the second point.

  31. elastigirl: ok. so, reading between the lines and going through a process of elimination, if ones loves homemade warm dark chocolate pudding and a foot massage, I infer that one doesn’t ‘gnash their teeth’ while eating homemade warm dark chocolate pudding and getting a foot massage.

    am i on track?

    Yes. Gnashing your teeth is not supposed to be pleasant.

  32. Max: How many times have we heard “But man, he could sure preach!” in reference to fallen leaders: Hybels, Driscoll, MacDonald, Ravi, etc. etc.

    To which I respond “So what!” Devils masquerading as angels of light are some of the best preachers on the planet.

    Recently a former mega church pastor (fired 2 years ago and put back up on a new stage 2 months later after a nasty church split) Patrick Garcia resigned from his new church due to an “inappropriate relationship”. We can only assume he’s a good public speaker/entertainer, as his friends are already working on “restoration”.

  33. Dave A A: resigned from his new church due to an “inappropriate relationship”. We can only assume he’s a good public speaker/entertainer, as his friends are already working on “restoration”.

    Sounds too familiar. I can think of a dozen or more celebrity pastors who barely cooled off after immoral failure before their followers launched them into unrepentant comebacks. Such is the Christian Industrial Complex in America … anything goes. There’s a segment of the American church which loves to have leaders like that … it makes them feel better about their own rotten lifestyle … they can have the world, the flesh and the devil – and Jesus, too (or so they think).

  34. Muslin, fka Dee Holmes: Yes. Gnashing your teeth is not supposed to be pleasant.

    Didn’t one of the Biblical Manhood types claim if he would be “Gnashing his Teeth” if he were ever pulled over by a FEMALE cop?

  35. Brian: “In Raleigh, the abuse began when Goodrich introduced a game of truth or dare to the group, Moyers said. The dares became increasingly inappropriate, he said, with the boys eventually engaging in what police have described as group masturbation sessions.”

    Like becoming a “made man” in the Mafia – make the initiate break a taboo beyond the point of no return, so he can never back out. Like the post-Hammerfall “cannibal army” cult with their sacred “stewpot” in Lucifer’s Hammer, once you eat of the Stewpot, you Are One Of Them.

    And Same-Sex Pelvic Issues are the Unpardonable Sin Taboo of American Christians.

  36. Brian: I’m still identifying my blind spots too.

    The reason they’re called “blind spots” is whosoever has them cannot see them.
    Only an Outsider can, and to that Outsider they’re glaringly obvious.
    This holds for both singular and plural, individual and community.

  37. Headless Unicorn Guy: The reason they’re called “blind spots” is whosoever has them cannot see them.
    Only an Outsider can, and to that Outsider they’re glaringly obvious.

    Partially agree. A friend worked for a boss who kept telling the work team about a watch she wanted for Christmas. The team got the hint—and the watch—but did not see why that was so wrong. My friend’s reaction never got beyond “Huh?”

    I think it works this way in other situations too. Mr. Hypothetical always scowls through family gatherings and doesn’t know why. The family thinks he’s a pain, but their thinking never goes beyond “can we disinvite him?” Nobody ties it back to that terrible experience they all know about.

  38. Friend: Partially agree. A friend worked for a boss who kept telling the work team about a watch she wanted for Christmas. The team got the hint—and the watch—but did not see why that was so wrong. My friend’s reaction never got beyond “Huh?”

    I don’t know. I think “gifts flow down” is a common standard in business. Some people aren’t interested in anything but themselves, but I have to believe that most of those people are perfectly capable of learning self awareness or at least creating a pattern of asking if something is bad, good, or best. I just don’t think our society teaches that very well. Sometimes I think our culture would be much better served by less focus on academics and more focus on learning how to be a good person who can be responsible for themselves.

  39. Headless Unicorn Guy: Female Snowy Owl from the plumage.

    I saw on PBS that even though their wings have a huge amount of lift (all Owls), they still would not disturb a path of simulated dust motes while gliding over it.
    Even so, some of the scientists involved in the experiment will still say there’s no God.
    Here’s where I believe the Bible when it says they’re fools…

  40. ishy: I think “gifts flow down” is a common standard in business.

    That amazes me. In decades of work, I’ve never been in a job where a boss said in a meeting, “I’d love to have this $400 ___ for Christmas.” In a whole lot of jobs, that would be illegal and begging for a call to the fraud, waste, and abuse hot line. Most of my bosses quietly discouraged employees from spending money on the boss.

  41. ishy,

    Sorry, Ishy. I might have totally misunderstood what you were saying. I certainly do agree that we need to teach people to be good and ethical. And I sincerely hope you haven’t been buying the boss a lot of watches!

  42. elastigirl,

    That song really resonates with me. I have endured much pain in my life, childhood and adulthood. You might get a hint about the adult pain if you take a good look at the name I use here. But I also chose this name because there is a bit of hope at the end of that story. And it also gives me great hope that He who knew me from the foundations of the earth will one day give me a new name – “And to (her) that overcomes I will give a white stone, and a new name written on the stone which no one knows but (she) who receives it” Rev 2:17. Also “to (she) that overcomes I will write upon her the name of my God, and the name of the city of my God, the New Jerusalem, and My new name” Rev 3:12. Have you read the allegory Hinds Feet in High Places by Hannah Hurnard? It’s a sort of Pilgrim’s Progress story. The tale of a young woman named Much Afraid who takes a chance to follow the Shepherd away from her relatives the Fearings, and into a journey of acceptance and joy. At the end of the journey the Shepherd gives her a new name. It’s a beautiful, hope-giving tale, and one I have treasured greatly on my own journey.

  43. Friend: In a whole lot of jobs, that would be illegal and begging for a call to the fraud, waste, and abuse hot line.

    SECULAR jobs.

  44. In many cases when abuse occurs, there’s the abuser, the abused and ostensibly God present during the event.

    Like the nature of suffering, most christians come to their own reason why that occurs.

    But for the literalist interpretation God must allow this to occur for a reason. Otherwise he could stop it, but choses not to. In the culture of compliance that dictates much religious thought, this can range from the nebulous “plan” at best to “divinely ordained” at worst. We’ve seen the sin leveling, the repugnant idea that there is some lesson in forgiveness for both parties, the supreme silliness (and not ha ha silliness) that it was preordained before the beginning of time.

    In the practical universe we have to come to the conclusion that like much of the suffering of the world, it’s kind of arbitrary that God or Jesus are going to step in (for whatever reason it’s not happening now in any meaningful way – maybe in biblical times, but not now).

    In my christian years, I rationalized it by believing that God works through my hands. My christianity was less literal and more trancendental, like Las Vegas, what happened in eternity stayed in eternity.

    Ultimately it is not God who will intervene to help unless we intervene on his behalf to help. Jesus will not come on a golden chariot to stop abuse (heck it’s happening in places where he’s being worshipped – so if that doesn’t move him to action, I don’t know what does… but I digress).

    And to those that blame Satan, if there is a Satan, I think he’s the laziest clown in the universe. A cosmic slacker sitting on his couch stuffing his face with the cosmic equivalent of Doritos watching people blame him for their evil actions…and laughing.

    Maybe eternity will have its reward, but it’s up to us to act in this world, we will be the only ones responsible for justice in this world (as opposed to vengeance or viligantism). If God acts in this reality then it’s through our hands and our choices. Christianity should mean service to a greater good, not blind obeisance to corrupt systems that call themselves “religion”.

  45. Headless Unicorn Guy: SECULAR jobs.

    You’re right, there’s no fraud hot line for church jobs. But I have worked for both secular and church organizations. The bosses at church did not hit me up for money or gifts, or membership or donations (although they probably assumed I gave). I was treated well there and given great work. That gig did not pay anyone very much, including the big wheels. I guess that counts as good news.

  46. Leah Jacobs,

    i’m so sorry for your pain and circumstances. it just sucks.

    i’m glad the song resonated. i can’t listen without breaking down in tears — the honesty & sincerity of it.

    i reckon you have a new name now.

  47. Julie Roys rebukes the continuing cover-up at the Summit Church by celebrity boss JD Greear.
    “ An Open Letter to J.D. Greear: Stop Misleading the Church about Bryan Loritts
    By Julie Roys
    This week, The Immigration Coalition removed Bryan Loritts from its upcoming conference after examining evidence that Loritts had covered up sex crimes at a previous church. Earlier in the week, someone had written the conference organizers, expressing concern about Loritts. The organizers responded that “with J.D. Greear and The Summit Church’s internal investigation . . . we felt it was okay to add (Loritts) to our speaker lineup.”

    The organizers also forwarded a letter by you, Pastor Greear, indicating that Loritts had been cleared of wrongdoing.”

    Much more at this link: https://julieroys.com/open-letter-greear-loritts/

  48. Jack: But for the literalist interpretation God must allow this to occur for a reason.

    We’ve all heard this dogma that everything happens for a ‘reason’.
    I’m now convinced that it’s just more hallowed nonsense.
    In my opinion, life is just a great big roulette wheel, sometimes ya’ win, and sometimes ya’ lose, no rhyme, no reason, both good and bad poo-poo just happen.

  49. Abigail:
    Why do people sit by them in court to show support for this bastard? Because it wasnt THEIR boy who was molested!!!

    JMJ/Christian Monist has blogged and written about how in the rural Tennessee church where he grew up it was general knowledge that one of the Elders (or choir leader?) was a pedo predator. The Pillars of the Church would steer new members with kids to said Elder so he would rape THEIR kids, not Mine. All very Pious and Moral. I think said Elder Pedo was in charge of the music and/or choir and they REALLY Loved how he did those Hymns.

  50. Jack: Maybe eternity will have its reward, but it’s up to us to act in this world, we will be the only ones responsible for justice in this world (as opposed to vengeance or viligantism). If God acts in this reality then it’s through our hands and our choices. Christianity should mean service to a greater good, not blind obeisance to corrupt systems that call themselves “religion”.

    Well said Jack.
    Well put.

  51. Jack: Maybe eternity will have its reward, but it’s up to us to act in this world, we will be the only ones responsible for justice in this world (as opposed to vengeance or viligantism).

    Otherwise, all we’re doing is sitting quietly with folded hands mouthing Pious Platitudes.
    “God will Judge…”
    “They will have their Reward in Eternity…”
    “I’ll Pray For You…”

  52. Muff Potter: We’ve all heard this dogma that everything happens for a ‘reason’.
    I’m now convinced that it’s just more hallowed nonsense.

    Yet another Pious Platitude.